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Notes From This Episode:
Background
- As we look back in our marriages, we may find that, more often than not, we are the mom, the enforcer, the money minder, the wife, and sometimes our husband’s mothers, but not his bride.
- It is amazing how quickly we change from our husband’s bride – nurturing a love with excitement, tenderness, empathy, affection, humor, and passion – to an attitude of “Married, now let’s move on with life”.
- We want our husbands to see us in our marriages as the innocent, sweet, youthful, flirty girl he fell in love with – whether we are 20, 35, or 60 years-old.
- That requires us to love and find that woman again and be intentional about creating her.
Becoming His Bride Again
- We want to take care of ourselves as much as we did when we were trying to snatch him and so that we the confidence that is attractive to him.
- We ought to use the kind words we used when we were dating.
- We need to show him our respect and accept him – faults and all – as we did when we were dating and engaged.
- It is never too late to stop and reassess and change course.
- I have heard from young women that their husbands no longer spoil them or treat them as they did when they were dating.
- I think men have the same issues we have, but if we lead with tenderness, respect, and affection, they will respond.
- Let’s be the first in the relationship to change course.
- Here are some ideas to help become his bride again:
- Kiss in the morning and when you see him after work – really kiss him!
- Shower! Do your hair and put on makeup, just like you did before you got married.
- Remember how much time you used to spent getting yourself ready for dates?
- Show him physical affection.
- Write little notes to him telling him how much you love him and appreciate all that he does for you and your family.
- Let him know you appreciate him.
- Speak kindly to him – with respect.
- Ask him what his favorite meal is and make it every few weeks.
- Waste time with him doing what he wants.
- Put the phone down when you are together.
Final Thoughts
- Think of ways in your own life where you can reach back to that woman who was caught up in the falling in love stage.
- Ask your husband what he loved about you when you were dating, but don’t let your feelings get hurt, and be humble to see where he needs you.
- If you commit to your husband with tenderness, action, and thoughtfulness, you will see a change in him as well.